Friday, July 13, 2007

Short Post

I had a random, semi-anonymous e-mail this morning telling me that my posts were too long, and that if I want more readers I should write shorter reader-friendly posts.

How about I just start writing with all abbreviations? Wld tht b cool w u? I cld do ths 4eva. I rck.

Maybe I should stop writing elaborate stories and just focus on regular everyday things that happen to me:

Dear Readers: Today I woke up and took a shower. The soap was just a sliver, but I had already gotten in the water and I didn't want to get back out. I just made it work for me. Don't you hate that? Sincerely, GR (your BFF)

How about this for a suggestion? How about you have a nice bowl of shut the fuck up?

Is this post succinct enough for you, asshole?

ADDENDUM: Okay I feel bad now that DmbMeg said I was full of hate. I'm sorry semi-anonymous e-mailer. I shouldn't have told you to shut the fuck up or called you an asshole. You were only trying to make me a better "blogger." Maybe you are actually the King of Bloggers and you were providing benevolent advise. Semi-Anonymous e-mailer, since we are making up, I would like to say that I couldn't tell from your e-mail address if you are male or female. If the latter, maybe we could talk some more. You could provide me some writing advice in person, say over tequila shots and ecstasy. Send me a photo and your stats, and we'll talk.


dmbmeg said...

Whoa! So much hate!

At lease you get mail. All I get is random naked pictures--and that's because I am sending them to myself.

Anonymous said...

I think you should write longer, more detailed posts.

I'm not kidding.

Yoffi said...

I'm with dmbmeg - i get no mail. And in recent posts all my readers (the 3 or 4 people that came once in a while) have left and are probably not coming back.

*Tries to make sad little cute face*


Instead ends up with ugly distorted "was your mother butt ugly?" face.

Oh well.

mindy said...

How was it semi-anonymous?

stephen said...

Your posts are a bit long.

Just saying..

(Note: said with extreme sarcasm, not to be taken seriously. I know by stating that I am thereby ruining the joke, but I feel that emotionless text is ineffifient when trying to convey sarcasm. Ya know?)

Lucy said...

I write long-winded posts as well. I dunno what that Anon emailer is thinking. I think when a blogger goes on a rant it's divine--makes me feel sane. Okay that was a back-handed compliment. But isn't getting the inside scoop to a blogger's madness that best part of blogging. Keep doin' your thang! Nice to come across your blog!

Garrett Reid said...

DmbMeg - This is a bit late - but I made an addendum. I never get random naked pictures - only hate mail. Maybe it would be cool if I got random hateful nakedness.

Anon - Things tend to ramble on and on as it is. I don't know if I can do longer. I can promise, however, to be less coherent.

Yoffi - See above response to DmbMeg. It seems we are all lacking e-mails. Maybe we should all trade random hateful naked e-mails?

Mindy - It was a yahoo e-mail address with no profile and just initials attached to it. I guess that means it may be fully anonymous - I don't know much about these things.

Stephen - Glad you pointed out the sarcasm. Otherwise we were about to go to war. I don't really know what that entails - but it would probably end badly for me.

Lucy - Thanks for stopping by and saying that my posts make me look crazy, and make everyone else look sane. I tend to agree.

Winter said...

I like your post just the way they are.

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